(M)att's Offical Homepage That Does Not Suck

UPDATED
4/17/98
http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Vault/3285

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News&Updates
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Disclaimer
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All_About_Me
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Cool_Links
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Humor
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Cartoons
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Quotes
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Midis&Wavs
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ASCII
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Music
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People_Search
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Awards
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JAVA_GAME
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Sign_Guestbook
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View_Guestbook

My_Form
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Email_Me
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Free_Speech Macs_Suck

Geocities Lpage Netscape

Statistics show that (M)att's Homepage That Does Not Suck is best viewed with Netscape.
Statistics also show that (M)att's Homepage That Does Not Suck loses some of it's viewing qualities if viewed on AOL. So if you are using AOL download Netscape!
More statistics show that Deja Vu is contagious.
More Statistics show that Deja Vu is contagious.
Even more Statistics show that if you have three widgets and you owe 5 widgets then you owe nothing because wigdets are a fictional entity.
These Statistics have been brought to you by (M)att.


Cloud_riding_Chocobo
Warning:
Chocobo Crossing
(If you have any problems at all with loading my page, viewing my page, links that don't work, or anything at all tell me as soon as possible.)
Beware_of_Lions,_Tigers,_and_Bears!!!
To Continue any further you must have a sense of humor...you stupid, moronic schmuck.
Beware of Subliminal Messages! Beware of Subliminal Messages! Beware of subliminal Messages!

Tony Mata, Click Here.

Greetings Earthling. You are from Earth? Right?... Welcome to my homepage that is Highly Devoted to Cool Stuff and the Art of having fun. You are visitor number.......drum role please...... A minus 7,700,000 that has stopped by at (M)att's Homepage (that by the way doesn't suck) since 1/7/97. Welcome to the place where the fun never ends; the very edge of the internet; a place where reality ends and unreality begins. Yes, you have made it to (M)att's Zone. Don't look back, don't touch that dial, because I control the horrizontal | and the vertical -. You are about to see new and interesting sites...and sounds. I have a lot of humorous comments and things on my site. If you stop to look around a little you may just laugh a bit. Why have I made this page, you might ask. Well, I made this page just to piss eveyone off who's ever said: "Why are you so damn Optimistic? Stop clownin' around and be serious. You're living in a fantasy world, get back in reality. LIVE IN THE NOW!" Well, I say to you all: "Kiss my three headed monkey and sign my guestbook, EVIL VILIANS!" With the removal of all the pesimists the world would be a much happier place to live in. It really is that bad and they are out to get you. Okay, enough of my babbling. "GET ON WITH IT!" Alrighty, if you like Humor, Jokes, Midi, Monty Python, Final Fantasy, Sience Fiction, Cartoons, and such you may journey onward. If NOT, well, journey onward. If you have come to the realization that I may be insane, journey onward. Whatever you may be feeling just enter anyways. It's a blast...Oh, and don't forget to Sign in at the front desk or fill out my latest form. Thank you and Journey Onward.--(M)att Patterson

By the way, the thing about the removal of all the pesimists is just a joke. I tend to joke a lot. If it helps imagine me talking in a slightly sarcastic, wild eyed with a funny grin on my face while you read the introduction.

...And remember to keep on the lookout for 3 Headed Monkeys:)

Three
News&Updates

4/17/98

I added a whole lotta pictures to my Hot chicks Page. If you're a guy go check it out. If not, well......don't.

I also have a Disclaimer up on my website. The link is on the left side bar and at the bottom of the page. The Disclaimer has a lot of information on copyright and rules that this page goes by. I've also got a neat little Dilbert comic and recorded message on it as well:)

4/16/98

Check out my Cool Links page's new look.

A month later and I am now back. Well, it's the middle of Spring Break. notice that I say Spring break and not Easter Vacation. Well, the reason is because that's what it's called now. You see Easter Break is too threatening to say in the US now, so this is Spring break. Dumbest thing i've ever heard of. Sounds like a discription of all my past Slinkys.

3/28/98

I added a Java Game, a border around the UPDATE thingy at the top, changed a few ALT descriptions, fixed a few errors, and then looked at it all, smiled, and said, "It's good."


Old News and Updates

� (M)att Patterson, 1996, 1997, 1998

"I don't think think the Ranger's gonna like this, Yogi. This guy's more punk than me."
Disclaimer